![\"\"](\"http:\/\/martinemussies.nl\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/isa-budogirl-chibi-by-martine-mussies-1024x1024.png\")
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Martine Embraces Her Late Autism Diagnosis:<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n\u201cI\u2019ve built up so much resilience\u2014perhaps I wouldn\u2019t have, had I been diagnosed as a child.\u201d<\/em>
by Isa Russchenberg<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nAround half of autistic women receive their diagnosis later in life, or are first misdiagnosed with something entirely inaccurate. For these women, it can be especially difficult to find a place in society, as they often feel \u201cdifferent\u201d. This sense of disconnection can deeply affect their mental health and overall wellbeing. One of these women is Martine Mussies, who was misdiagnosed for years and only received her autism diagnosis as an adult. \u201cWithout structure, there\u2019s no system\u2014and then there\u2019s simply too much to think about. That\u2019s when I overflow.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Martine was diagnosed with autism at the age of thirty. She lives in a supported flat in Utrecht with her cat, Boris. With assistance in daily life, she\u2019s able to focus on her academic work from home as a researcher at Maastricht University, where she studies fan art. She\u2019s a trained musician, currently writing her second book, and is known for her colourful style and deep love of Japanese culture. These days, her life is more balanced\u2014but that wasn\u2019t always the case.<\/p>\n\n\n\n![\"My](\"http:\/\/martinemussies.nl\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/image-1.png\")
Picture by Isa – more @ Instagram<\/a>.<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\nA Rocky Road Through School<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Martine\u2019s struggles began early. \u201cIt was a very bumpy road,\u201d she recalls. Things others found difficult often came easily to her\u2014like music. \u201cIf I heard a song on the radio, I could immediately play it on the piano.\u201d But the things that seemed natural to others often confused her. \u201cIf a recipe says \u2018add a pinch of salt\u2019\u2014what\u2019s a pinch? How should I know what that means?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
That kind of confusion is not unusual. The Autism Centre in Groningen explains that autistic people may notice details\u2014like the phrase \u2018a pinch of salt\u2019\u2014but interpret them differently, sometimes missing the overall context. School was especially hard for Martine. \u201cI didn\u2019t understand things, or I took them too literally. I eventually went to what was then called a \u2018Lomschool\u2019, now known as special secondary education.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
With support from many helpers, she completed MAVO and HAVO, but struggled again at VWO level. \u201cI completely broke down,\u201d she says quietly. \u201cIn the end, I took the final exams without attending classes\u2014and passed.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Looking back, she finds it surreal. \u201cGiven who I am, it just wasn\u2019t possible. I couldn\u2019t manage being in a huge building, changing classrooms and teachers every hour,\u201d she pauses. \u201cEveryone else could do it, so I thought I had to just do it too.\u201d Even her family knew something wasn\u2019t quite right. \u201cIt didn\u2019t fit. Not really.\u201d She went on to university hoping it would be different, but the same issues kept returning. \u201cI used to joke: \u2018If I show up at the right place at the right time with the right stuff, I\u2019ll get a nine on the exam.\u2019 And sometimes I did.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
A Misdiagnosis<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Through her university, Martine was referred to a psychologist. \u201cThat didn\u2019t go well. He diagnosed me with borderline personality disorder.\u201d The diagnosis didn\u2019t sit right with her. \u201cIt just didn\u2019t feel true. And I couldn\u2019t understand how he reached that conclusion.\u201d She wasn\u2019t allowed to question it either. \u201cIf I expressed concerns, I got a lecture about leaving things to the professionals.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
She received treatment from this psychologist\u2014an experience she doesn\u2019t like to speak about. \u201cHonestly, I think I left that therapy with trauma. He misinterpreted everything through the lens of borderline.\u201d She eventually stopped therapy, which left her feeling even worse. \u201cI thought, \u2018See, I can\u2019t even finish therapy.\u2019 I felt like a failure.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n![\"My](\"http:\/\/martinemussies.nl\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/image-2.png\")
Picture by Isa – more @ Instagram<\/a>.<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\nA Clear Diagnosis at Last<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Martine\u2019s mother is a child psychologist, but at the time had limited experience with autism in girls. \u201cThere just wasn\u2019t enough information available\u2014especially about so-called high-functioning autism.\u201d Looking back, she realises her father was likely autistic too, although never formally diagnosed. \u201cIt\u2019s almost ridiculous we didn\u2019t notice. He had the entire train timetable memorised,\u201d she says with a laugh.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Her aunt Anke, also a psychologist, referred her to a psychiatrist who worked part-time with borderline patients and part-time with autistic clients. \u201cAnke said I should talk to her\u2014she could see what was really going on.\u201d During their first conversation, the psychiatrist burst out laughing. \u201cI panicked\u2014did I say something wrong? But she laughed because it was so obvious<\/em> to her.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\nMartine was initially doubtful. \u201cI thought, \u2018Maybe? I\u2019m not sure.\u2019 I still associated autism with seven-year-old boys playing with train sets.\u201d But after joining online support groups for autistic women, everything began to make sense. \u201cThere are millions<\/em> of people like me. I had no idea.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n\u201cAutism is a spectrum,\u201d Martine explains. \u201cWhich means people experience it in different ways and to different degrees.\u201d As she read the diagnostic criteria in the psychological literature, something clicked. \u201cOn a scale from one to ten, I scored a nine or ten on nearly every trait. It was so<\/em> clear.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\nWhy did it take so long to be recognised? Martine has a theory. \u201cI\u2019m a woman\u2014and I always somehow managed. With lots of help, yes, but I coped. So it went unnoticed.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n
\n![\"Book](\"http:\/\/martinemussies.nl\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/book-case-organisation-for-neurodivergent.jpg\")
Book case organisation for neurodivergent brains… picture by Isa<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\nSystems and Routines<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Despite the late diagnosis, Martine has developed ways to live more comfortably. Her secret? Systems and routines. \u201cOtherwise I wouldn\u2019t manage,\u201d she says. \u201cWhen I need to go out, I get dressed from top to bottom. I make a list of what to bring, find each item, then tick them off before I put anything in my bag.\u201d Only after completing the routine can she relax and leave the house. \u201cIt takes a lot of time. I can\u2019t just think, \u2018Right, keys, phone, let\u2019s go.\u2019 I have to consciously<\/em> think about every step.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\nHer routine doesn\u2019t stop there. \u201cI also have to do my gas-check mantra. I\u2019ve left the stove on a few times.\u201d Martine has similar systems for everything\u2014from organising sheet music to managing her kitchen. Her bookshelf brims with sticky notes, and she has a planning system<\/a> including a master list of tasks like laundry and dishes. \u201cOtherwise I just don\u2019t know. I know what needs doing, but then suddenly I\u2019ve got nothing left to wear. I\u2019ll think, \u2018Huh? Didn\u2019t I do the laundry yesterday? Or the day before?\u2019 I really can\u2019t tell \u2014 turns out it was a month ago.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\nTo figure out which systems would work, Martine had to experiment a great deal and eventually build a fixed structure. \u201cIf there\u2019s no structure, there\u2019s no system \u2014 and then everything boils over.\u201d Fortunately, she now has many working systems in place and a detailed planner. \u201cIf it works, it works. Everything just needs a fixed place, otherwise I lose everything and it\u2019s chaos again. Luckily, this way works well for me.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
by Isa Russchenberg<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n
Around half of autistic women receive their diagnosis later in life, or are first misdiagnosed with something entirely inaccurate. For these women, it can be especially difficult to find a place in society, as they often feel \u201cdifferent\u201d. This sense of disconnection can deeply affect their mental health and overall wellbeing. One of these women is Martine Mussies, who was misdiagnosed for years and only received her autism diagnosis as an adult. \u201cWithout structure, there\u2019s no system\u2014and then there\u2019s simply too much to think about. That\u2019s when I overflow.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Martine was diagnosed with autism at the age of thirty. She lives in a supported flat in Utrecht with her cat, Boris. With assistance in daily life, she\u2019s able to focus on her academic work from home as a researcher at Maastricht University, where she studies fan art. She\u2019s a trained musician, currently writing her second book, and is known for her colourful style and deep love of Japanese culture. These days, her life is more balanced\u2014but that wasn\u2019t always the case.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Martine\u2019s struggles began early. \u201cIt was a very bumpy road,\u201d she recalls. Things others found difficult often came easily to her\u2014like music. \u201cIf I heard a song on the radio, I could immediately play it on the piano.\u201d But the things that seemed natural to others often confused her. \u201cIf a recipe says \u2018add a pinch of salt\u2019\u2014what\u2019s a pinch? How should I know what that means?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n That kind of confusion is not unusual. The Autism Centre in Groningen explains that autistic people may notice details\u2014like the phrase \u2018a pinch of salt\u2019\u2014but interpret them differently, sometimes missing the overall context. School was especially hard for Martine. \u201cI didn\u2019t understand things, or I took them too literally. I eventually went to what was then called a \u2018Lomschool\u2019, now known as special secondary education.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n With support from many helpers, she completed MAVO and HAVO, but struggled again at VWO level. \u201cI completely broke down,\u201d she says quietly. \u201cIn the end, I took the final exams without attending classes\u2014and passed.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Looking back, she finds it surreal. \u201cGiven who I am, it just wasn\u2019t possible. I couldn\u2019t manage being in a huge building, changing classrooms and teachers every hour,\u201d she pauses. \u201cEveryone else could do it, so I thought I had to just do it too.\u201d Even her family knew something wasn\u2019t quite right. \u201cIt didn\u2019t fit. Not really.\u201d She went on to university hoping it would be different, but the same issues kept returning. \u201cI used to joke: \u2018If I show up at the right place at the right time with the right stuff, I\u2019ll get a nine on the exam.\u2019 And sometimes I did.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Through her university, Martine was referred to a psychologist. \u201cThat didn\u2019t go well. He diagnosed me with borderline personality disorder.\u201d The diagnosis didn\u2019t sit right with her. \u201cIt just didn\u2019t feel true. And I couldn\u2019t understand how he reached that conclusion.\u201d She wasn\u2019t allowed to question it either. \u201cIf I expressed concerns, I got a lecture about leaving things to the professionals.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n She received treatment from this psychologist\u2014an experience she doesn\u2019t like to speak about. \u201cHonestly, I think I left that therapy with trauma. He misinterpreted everything through the lens of borderline.\u201d She eventually stopped therapy, which left her feeling even worse. \u201cI thought, \u2018See, I can\u2019t even finish therapy.\u2019 I felt like a failure.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Martine\u2019s mother is a child psychologist, but at the time had limited experience with autism in girls. \u201cThere just wasn\u2019t enough information available\u2014especially about so-called high-functioning autism.\u201d Looking back, she realises her father was likely autistic too, although never formally diagnosed. \u201cIt\u2019s almost ridiculous we didn\u2019t notice. He had the entire train timetable memorised,\u201d she says with a laugh.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Her aunt Anke, also a psychologist, referred her to a psychiatrist who worked part-time with borderline patients and part-time with autistic clients. \u201cAnke said I should talk to her\u2014she could see what was really going on.\u201d During their first conversation, the psychiatrist burst out laughing. \u201cI panicked\u2014did I say something wrong? But she laughed because it was so obvious<\/em> to her.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Martine was initially doubtful. \u201cI thought, \u2018Maybe? I\u2019m not sure.\u2019 I still associated autism with seven-year-old boys playing with train sets.\u201d But after joining online support groups for autistic women, everything began to make sense. \u201cThere are millions<\/em> of people like me. I had no idea.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAutism is a spectrum,\u201d Martine explains. \u201cWhich means people experience it in different ways and to different degrees.\u201d As she read the diagnostic criteria in the psychological literature, something clicked. \u201cOn a scale from one to ten, I scored a nine or ten on nearly every trait. It was so<\/em> clear.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Why did it take so long to be recognised? Martine has a theory. \u201cI\u2019m a woman\u2014and I always somehow managed. With lots of help, yes, but I coped. So it went unnoticed.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n Despite the late diagnosis, Martine has developed ways to live more comfortably. Her secret? Systems and routines. \u201cOtherwise I wouldn\u2019t manage,\u201d she says. \u201cWhen I need to go out, I get dressed from top to bottom. I make a list of what to bring, find each item, then tick them off before I put anything in my bag.\u201d Only after completing the routine can she relax and leave the house. \u201cIt takes a lot of time. I can\u2019t just think, \u2018Right, keys, phone, let\u2019s go.\u2019 I have to consciously<\/em> think about every step.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Her routine doesn\u2019t stop there. \u201cI also have to do my gas-check mantra. I\u2019ve left the stove on a few times.\u201d Martine has similar systems for everything\u2014from organising sheet music to managing her kitchen. Her bookshelf brims with sticky notes, and she has a planning system<\/a> including a master list of tasks like laundry and dishes. \u201cOtherwise I just don\u2019t know. I know what needs doing, but then suddenly I\u2019ve got nothing left to wear. I\u2019ll think, \u2018Huh? Didn\u2019t I do the laundry yesterday? Or the day before?\u2019 I really can\u2019t tell \u2014 turns out it was a month ago.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n To figure out which systems would work, Martine had to experiment a great deal and eventually build a fixed structure. \u201cIf there\u2019s no structure, there\u2019s no system \u2014 and then everything boils over.\u201d Fortunately, she now has many working systems in place and a detailed planner. \u201cIf it works, it works. Everything just needs a fixed place, otherwise I lose everything and it\u2019s chaos again. Luckily, this way works well for me.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\nA Rocky Road Through School<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
A Misdiagnosis<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
A Clear Diagnosis at Last<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Systems and Routines<\/h3>\n\n\n\n